God Our Father

Becoming a parent has made me see God as our Father in a deeper way.

Cece looks to John and I to have her needs met and to be loved and comforted, as she should. Last night, John and I were looking at her and he said, “I don’t think she knows just how much we love her.” Cece feels safe and loved, but does she truly grasp the depth of our love? She doesn’t understand much yet.

As much as we try to communicate just how much we love her, she can’t really quite understand until she grows older. There are things we just can’t explain to her. When she has to get shots at the doctor, and looks up at us with hurt and betrayal, we can’t explain to her that we are doing this out of our great love for her and that it’s for her own good, despite how much we wish we could. In her perspective, she is confused why mom and dad would let her experience pain when we seem fully capable, and even desire, to protect her from harm.

How much of our suffering is this way? We look to God and ask:

“How could you let this happen?”

“Why don’t you prevent this?”

“Do you even love me?”

Does God’s heart ache when we suffer, just as my own heart ached to watch Cece cry? Does he long to have us understand his deep love for us, but we can’t fully comprehend yet?

Perhaps our suffering will make sense in glory when we can finally understand, just as Cece will one day know why she gets shots.